Being a bottom sets you up on a path for failure. Wait, what?

Ok, let’s read this first from “life coach” Paul Angelo, who issued a press release on the subject (as well as shilling his own services)

Angelo says: “From Neuro-linguistic programming (NLP), we know that a person’s thinking is strongly influenced by his body position. The fastest way to increase satisfaction and self-esteem is to align the thinking with the position/movement of the body, commonly referred to as a mind-body connection. This is often achieved through physical exercise, meditation and affirmations.

For example, if you say to yourself – ‘yes I can do it’ and if you flex your arm, clench your fist and bend your knees all in one move – you get a strong feeling of power.

When the body performs activities that are not in congruence with the beliefs and logic of the brain, conflict is created and with each repetition of the act, self-esteem of the person is reduced.”

Angelo explains that because men behave differently than women, the brain is taught to accept as valid all behaviors that are associated with masculinity and strength. The moment that the brain receives messages that are NOT congruent with the definition of masculinity – the person gets confused.

Aggressive or “pushy” bottoms are an example of this confusion. Those are gay men who succeeded in business and show masculinity in day-to-day life, but in the bedroom – end up engaging in receptive anal intercourse.

“The worse part about this destruction of self-esteem is that it’s on the subconscious level. A person will not feel anything during the act. And the pleasure derived from the act will override the logic necessary to correct the behavior. In addition, there is a delay between the act of anal intercourse and the reduction of self-esteem of the person” says Angelo.

“If you were to put all gay men together in a big warehouse and place the ‘bottoms’ on the left and the ‘tops’ on the right, you’d start seeing negative consequences of the anal sex play out in real life for the bottoms such as: disrespect for their general health, failure at work, failure in love and relationships.” says Angelo.

There you have it, boys.  If you bottom, you can count on your health going to hell, being a slacker at work, and your relationships will go to hell and a hand basket.  Yes, I was totally laughing when I said that.  Everybody on the web has had their fun with this one, and just based on the content I can’t leave it alone either.

For the record, I’ve known alot of guys that were a/all bottom, b/sub bottom, c/vers bottom, and I’ve yet to see one of them make some sort of illogical tie-in that “gee, maybe I’d be walking on sunshine if I switched to being a dom top.”  Nope, gay men don’t roll that way.  By the way, I consider myself versatile.  I love bottoming just as much as I do topping.  I have a great job, my health now is better than it was 20 years ago and I have a man (as well as a gay son) who love me.  My being the guy who grabs his ankles on occasion has had zero negative effect on my self esteem, and I’ve been sexually active since I was 13.  On April 3, I’ll be 48.

Mr. Angelo seems all too quick to pigeonhole gay men into the idea that if you’re not the one jamming it to a guy, then you’re assuming a submissive posture.  Gay men and sex aren’t that cut and dry, and for that matter neither are straights, bisexuals or lesbians.  We all don’t fit in the same square hole (pardon the pun).

Feel free to comment on this one.  I’m just going to file this piece under “weirdest story I’ll write for the rest of the year” and move on.”

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